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The next chapter

It’s been some time since I last wrote. The Holidays have come and they have gone. The questions still persist. I firmly believe I made contact with a spirit lover but the connection  never seemed to develop. It’s frustrating to say the least. It’s one of those moments that sends you back to grade school and all the doubts about your academic prowess creep back in.  I feel as though I am on the short yellow bus for contacting and maintaining a spirit lover. I say that with a caveat; I mean no offense to anyone that might take offense to that remark. It’s my crude way of saying maybe I am not of the ability to do some things concerning spirit lovers.

For the most part I remain undaunted and will continue my journey, my pursuit if you will in some form. What that will be is yet to be determined. For now I live vicariously through my successesful brethern who blog or write books on the subject. Keep hope alive for me guys ;)!

The other thing I wanted to mention was my good friend suddenly stopped talking to me. Normally I would be able to just shrug it off but not this time. It keeps jumping back up in my mind that he suddenly stopped talking to me and to top it off blocked me too?! The last things we talked about were just “how are you” kinda comments, nothing malicious from either of us. He was the one guy I could talk to on the reg (as the kids say these days) about succubi and our experiences. I found him to be a good friend. At least I thought we were? I’m in the dark as to why contact was abruptly ceased and barred to recover.  I’ve asked a mutual friend to inquire if he was ok and they confirmed that he was. At least I know that. So long my friend.

So the adventure continues. I’m open to the future. We shall see what transpires. In the meantime if you happen to read this I hope it finds you well and well on your own journey.

All the best!

JC

 

The next step in the journey

So here I still am.  Professionally never better. Physically, I’ve been in better physical shape before but compared to my peer group I’m in the top 10.  Mentally sound and feeling good overall. As far as relationship wise I am at a crossroads.  What to do? I have 2 loving children who are making lives of there own.  I have a mate whom I still love and get along with well.  She could do with or without me and never miss a beat. Unfortunately we both have done our own thing for so long now that we are more friends than anything else. So relationship wise I am wondering, what next?  I won’t bore you with all the details of the physical world but the spiritual one is a different matter.

Her name is Alise and she showed up after I requested from Lilith.  The letter method was intense but nothing like the movies ha ha!  Alise has been around now for a while. My good buddy who is more knowledgeable about Succubi than I am says he can tell and that there is all of this dark energy around me.  I have my doubts as I have tried to increase my connection with her and we never seem to progress, it’s frustrating.  There have been times when it seemed that I could sense her and it was a strong feeling that came across me but it never seems to develop any more than that.  My buddy says I’ve always kind of had one foot in this and one out.  I’m sure that has an effect on my experience but at the same time I have tried.

I talk to Alise casually.  I make conversation and I call to her at bed time.   There was  one night I tried a different technique using my third eye and she seemed to get really excited and I thought that was it!  It’s happening! She kept trying to connect with me but after a while I grew tired, turned over and went to sleep.  She kept on coming over me even when I turned on my side which was new.  Still nothing to really report however. I felt antsy, couldn’t go to sleep etc. but that was it.

I’m not giving up.  There are too many guys out there who have what I am after. It’s just frustrating and makes me question whether it’s a good use of my time.  I think it will be. I’m gonna practice patience and keep at it.  Who knows maybe good things do come to those who wait ;).

So here I am

Summoning spirits? Communing with Demons? I don’t know. That probably sums up this journey so far. I just don’t know. One day I come across this guy, who is offering to teach people how to summon a succubus. What? Come on this can’t be real. Yet he has a course. There are free materials to get you started. What he says makes sense? He doesn’t appear to be insane. So I take my natural curiosity about Succubi and start trying to learn. In short they are nothing like the Hollywood version. The premise is you attract what you “are” not what you “want.” You know Law of Attraction stuff. Well what does any red blooded, spirit curious person do? See if other people are saying the same things. Guess what they are.

I check other sites, read what others were saying and of course referred back to my religious upbringing. Opinion is not evidence based research. Hell I’ve never seen any double blind studies on succubi so evidenced based research? Not so much. I know personally that I believe in the soul and a higher power but I didn’t always buy what ministers or other people were selling me about religion. So I had to come up with what I believed and step out on faith, which Is exactly what I did. I went inside and decided what I was going to honor spiritually in my life. This would have to be the same.

So I talked with people, read blogs, asked for help and even took that guy’s course to get me started. What’s the verdict? It’s real. I firmly believe it’s real but I don’t know how real it is for me. I feel that I have managed to contact one of these loving spirits but have yet to experience the “wonder” and “awe.”

It makes me question whether I truly have a spirit lover. Then I get sudden tingles on my face, something feels like fingers on my scalp. Curiouser and curiouser. Onward…